Where do I even begin! Well thanking you seems like a good start! So…thank you from the bottom of my heart! I thank God for your life because I’m not sure where I would be without you!
Special thanks to my mum, my Pastors, my sisters, my best friend, group leaders, and my daughter’s godparents.
For helping my shame seem slightly more bearable, thank you!
For sticking up for me, thank you! For praying for and with me, thank you! Although, degraded by one whom I thought was a loved one and labelled by society as a single mum, you still associate yourself with me and call me friend, thank you!
For your phone calls, visits, gifts, money and prayers! Just having me on your mind, I am thankful and very grateful!
You were with me at the lowest point in my life and I will forever be grateful!
I count this year all joy, because in the end I had the last laugh! God turned my mourning into dancing, my crying into laughter! As I walked through my wilderness, I came out without a single scratch! A few bruises along the way, but the bruises were to remind me of His faithfulness not to remind me of any guilt, pain or shame!
My life must be obviously God! His hands must be woven within the depths of the cords of my life.
A vibrant and joyful young woman, then suddenly betrayed deeply by someone I foolishly involved myself with and ridiculously thought I could change, then getting pregnant, becoming a mother, whilst life continued – (full time work, the death of 4 family members, full time masters). God indeed enables those who are unable to do mighty things.
In the midst of it all, He reminded me that there was still so much to be thankful for.
- The clouds that gather in the morning and shelter us
- The sun that rises early just to warm us
- The loved ones that annoy us, but when we fall, lend us their helping hands
- The smell of fresh air that hits against the insides of our nostrils
My only regret was that I compromised my faith, the Lord was tapping my shoulder to wake up and I kept sleeping saying another 5 more minutes…thinking I could do all in my own strength.
It is important we use common sense and wisdom in our Christian walk, whilst remembering it is not in our power, but by the spirit.
I occasionally wake up and still ask myself ‘why me’, and whilst I am still on the journey of finding out, I have come to a reoccurring answer ‘why not me’ – I am content with that.
Thank you all once again for your real love towards me, I appreciate you!
As I walk the journey more and more, I realise there’s more to my story.
I had a dream once where God told me that He had given me a gift. I couldn’t understand it. It didn’t make sense. How can pain come from receiving a gift? Wern’t gifts supposed to be about gratitude, joy, praise and celebration? I received none of these with my gift.
I would have happily taken a new car, new job, even a new winter jumper!
With my head hung low, God simply whispered, “with every gift, it is the opening of the gift that is most important, the unwrapping, and it was not yet time to open my gift”.
Whatever your now looks like, however much the pain is, whatever the challenge, know that He can still give gifts in the most challenging times. Gifts of hope, grace, mercy and strength. He turns around times of dispear to times of laughter. Victims will become victors, tears of pain will becomes tears of joy.
However, you must must must be appreciative, thankful, grateful and you must be able to see the brighter side. Just edge over the mountain and you will see the sun rise.