As I sat in the waiting room patiently waiting for our turn, I was praying that she wouldn’t be a noisemaker! Everyone hates a noisemaker!! I looked around the room and we were all women, except one man sitting in the corner with his wife (I saw their wedding bands, well actually the rings were looking at me).
The waiting area was loud and the noisemakers were on full swing, runny noses on show and the beep sound that made your heart jump for joy just for a second as you thought it was your name being called, only to realise as your brain quickly made the connection it wasn’t actually your name.
“Everything is fine, she is doing well, developing and growing fast”. Thank God, it was one less thing I had to think about.
Little did I know hearing the words, ‘she’s fine’ would be words any parents yearns to hear when faced with a hospital visit, GP/ clinical check etc.
Come to think of it, not only has she been fine, but everything’s been fine. God has just made everything work out!
Day 1 – I’m really scared, I’ve just given birth. What do I do now? Checking your nostrils every few minutes to make sure you’re breathing. That’s normal right?
1/3 months – No I’m not used to you yet, a lot of people are coming over to visit, and I’m just worried about the mess they’re making and who will do the dishes.
4/6 months – I’m on my own with you now. Think I’ve forgotten how to bath you, clearly sticking you under the shower isn’t really an option.
7/9 months – Why won’t you just stop crying!!! I think you’re teething and I know it’s annoying for you, but annoying for me too.
10/12 months – Friends have stopped inviting me out. I have to go to work soon and I’m dreading the nursery run.
We made it. A whole year! I did it. So grateful to God and the amazing people He put around me. Yes, I’m used to you know and love every bit of you!
2 years – Why would anyone choose to be a single parent, it’s not meant to be done alone! This is really hard, not much food in the fridge, but your smile really does brighten up my day.
3 years – Yay riding a bike! Well-done baby. Your speech is so grown! How do you know so much?
4 years – Starting school! How did we end up being okay?
5 years – Things are starting to fall into place. I’m not perfect by a long shot, but it’s not just my journey, it’s yours too!
Dear you, 6 years ago, if you told me everything would work out (and people did). I would not have believed you. Things looked bad and things were bad. Things were ugly. But with every day that passed, every week, every month and every year, the load got lighter. There was still load to carry, but I realised in my weakness He was strong. The medical waiting room or any waiting room is a strange place. It can be a refection of where you are now, but its nothing to do with where you’re going or who you are to become. Ever heard the phrase ‘your gifts will make room for you’? Well so will your trials and your weak moments. They will be used as catalysts for your greatness, to move you forward. Wait this moment out, it does get better. Trust me I know.