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Some days are just hard

We all know that most days are hard, just trying to get out of bed, get yourself ready or maybe your kid(s). Maybe you look after an older parent or maybe you work nights and still have to get up early

Regardless of why, some days are just really hard

The struggle as they say is real

On this particular day, I remember waking up and I had had enough

I had no money, no food in the fridge (there was bread and onions), I had an 18 month old and my finances were in a mess. I was an emotional wreck and a certain ‘wolf’ I was involved with made everything in my life explode. It seemed like a never-ending cycle of being paid and the money going out again. Of being happy and then ridiculously sad.

That particular week, I recall my bank calling me from the fraud department because money had come into my account (I had gotten paid) and within 7 hours all the money had gone  (I had paid all my bills).

As the woman on the phone began to go through my transactions and asked if I knew the companies, at some point she felt slightly silly as I repeated “yes” to British Gas, London electricity, Thames water and various other organisations. Clearly, it wasn’t a case of me transferring money to drug cartels!!!

“Nope, no fraud here”, I chuckled. Thanks for your time she said and I hung up.

A few days later my bank called again and said as I was gone over my agreed over overdraft, I would have to be passed over to some department or other that could walk me through the next process of trying to reduce my debt. This usually meant consolidating my debt or increasing it!

Later that week an aunt called and asked why I didn’t want to get married. I’m not sure what memo she had received or maybe she saw the sign on my forehead that said, ‘NOT LOOKING FOR MARRIAGE, PLEASE MOVE ASIDE’

Needless to say, it had been a tough week and that particular morning I had my appraisal with my manager and I knew my performance of late hadn’t been great. I was usually so on top of my game but lately the struggle of motherhood, trying to understand my new space in life and dealing with guilt, shame and humiliation had meant that work life came last on my to do list!

FAST FORWARD…..

I managed to get through my appraisal

I managed to speak to the bank and rearrange my finances

I managed to start learning how to forgive myself and seek God’s guidance on my life

How?

  • Prayers had been prayed years, months ago for times I would really need it, times like that awful week I had.
  • Not just my prayers, but that of the key people around me, spiritual parents, biological parents, friends and family
  • Jesus has made intercession on my behalf before the Father and it was now coming to manifestation
  • My ‘good deeds’ at work had done a good job of going ahead of me, so when I had a dip in my performance, my manager knew I had it in me to do better
  • My bank had noticed that up until a set point, a certain life changing circumstance, I was pretty okay with managing my finances and so they were willing to bend a little for me
  • Favour went ahead of me and men were indeed drawn to the beauty of my rising

 

Dear you remember grace and mercy will take you where you cannot and are unable to go. It is so important to pray! Not just so that things can change now, but we have no idea what lies ahead of. Our prayers will pave a way for us when needed most

It always was seems worse than it actually is. Winter can only last for so long.

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